


Dahlia Drabbles

by Dahlia_Writes



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Asexual Fjord (Critical Role), Asexual Jester, Critical Role Spoilers, Drabble Collection, F/F, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-11-11
Updated: 2018-11-11
Packaged: 2019-08-22 04:30:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 7,297
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16590887
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dahlia_Writes/pseuds/Dahlia_Writes
Summary: Follower prompts, each chapter is it's own story with it's own prompt, check the notes for individual chapter warnings - consider the whole lot to be spoiler-rific for campaign 2





	1. Four Firbolgs Plus One

**Author's Note:**

> Confused firbolgs try to decide if one of them was flirting - Caduceus Clay+Pumat Sol

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Drabbles abound! This is from my Asks and Private prompts! 
> 
> Please enjoy this little one of Caduceus Clay + Pumat Sol! The prompt was “awkward flirting”

  
  
“Oh, that’s… That’s just wonderful.” the soft smile that grew across his face showed how much the softly pastel colored firbolg was enjoying himself.   
“How many of you are there?”  
“Oh, well, just the three of us, and then Pumat Prime.” “Well that is fantastic. I like this, a lot.”

Pumat three smiled at the comparatively thin man, as he waited for Prime to be fetched by Pumat two, “So, what brings you so far into civilization? We don’t often see other firbolgs around here.” 

“Oh, mainly the scenery, but this is just fantastic.”   
The areas of the simulacrum’s face that were not obscured by fur, mainly his nose and to a lesser degree his ears, received a dusting of a deeper hue as the possible implications of this statement ran through his mind. “Oh, ah, well- respectfully, we are happy to welcome you to the Invulnerable Vagrant. If there is anything you have an interest in, please don’t hesitate to ask.”  
  
The fellow looked up at him again, with a mildly dazed and happy expression. “Would it be okay if we just kept speaking? I really like you, you seem so nice.”  
  
“Well, I don’t mind, but you might rather speak to Pumat Prime- Pumat two just went to go get him.”   
  
“Ah, I don’t mind either way. So, do you all exist as a sort of hive mind, or are you each individuals like twins?”  
  
“That’s uh…” Three looked over at One, who shrugged. “Well, we’re simulacrum, which usually are kind of like autonomous unseen servants, but more useful. Though, we were made because of Prime’s work with the Cerberus Assembly, so…”  
  
The green and gold curtain that led to the back of the shop pulled open, revealing another Pumat with only slightly different accessories. “Alright me, what did you need?”  
  
“Oh, Prime, good; You’re here, thank goodness! We thought you’d like to meet this fellow here.”  
  
“Caduceus Clay, pleasure to meet you. You have such a fine establishment here, and-” he took a deep breath, smiling happily. “It smells just like I hoped it might.”  
  
The cannon firbolg sat where his clone had before, and looked the patron over, smiling just slightly while the Pumats one, two, and three, watched from nearby with far larger grins on their faces. “You brighten this space.”  
  
One of the simulacrum spoke up from where he was attending to the small goblin’s needs. “See Prime? He is, respectfully, very nice.”  
  
“Ah well, you’re too kind. I just like people. I’d love to talk to you sometime if you’re free, about where you came from, and what you do here. Maybe we can get together for tea sometime.”  
  
Prime shifted his eyes to the copies who were listening intently around the room with various members of the ragtag mercenary group that had recently become their best customers. “Well, I am-” A thumbs up from Pumat one made him pause, “-Respectfully, intrigued by your offer. Perhaps once I have refilled my wares?”  
  
The other firbolg smiled and blinked lazily at him. “That sounds lovely. Just let me know when you’d like to talk.”  
  
“Okaaaay.”  
  
When the pumats closed shop that night, Prime found himself scratching his head, and looking at the others in curiosity. “Hey, Me, was he asking me- I mean us, on a date?”   
  
The other three looked as baffled as he felt. “Maybe?”


	2. Comfortable Confessions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ace!Fjord+Ace!(ish)Jester; Modern college setting

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was a request from the lovely (and ever so patient) @mamzellecombeferre on Tumblr who requested an Ace!Fjord drabble, with Fjorster content; This was a lovely challenge, and I loved writing it! (I am also very open to constructive criticism, especially in the realm of Ace representation, as I am not Ace myself, and wish to do the community justice.)

The incessant ticking of the clock was getting on her nerves as the afternoon droned on. Jester was never good with monotony, and even less so when she had something to look forward to. The lack of distractions in the meantime gnawed at her subconscious as she sketched idly in her book, not really seeing what she drew.   
The room was too warm, the ticking seeming to make the time pass even more slowly; with a huff, she threw her possessions into her bag, and marched outside.  ****

  
The winds tugged playfully at her clothing as she walked through the campus, the winter storm clouds swirling overhead and creating interesting pieces of art in her mind’s eye. The community college wasn’t terribly large, but it’s architecture was pleasing, the people who populated the grounds fairly nice, and the professors well appointed.  
  
Walking briskly through the small gardens between each proper building, Jester made her way to the theater where her “Darling Suitor” as her mama called him, would be busy rehearsing. The cramped lobby had the feeling of a lush boudoir, which was offset by a beaten couch and coffee table, an even more cramped ticket booth, and a small set of stairs on the right and left that led to the stage beyond.  
  
Plopping down on the couch, her skirts spreading out in an artful arch as her mother had taught her, Jester re-assembled her pastels and her sketchbook, turning to a fresh page. From the drawn curtains across the room her ears picked up a lilting voice profess their love for the keeper of their heart before humming a few notes, and seeming to continue on with their work. Letting out a happy sigh, she snuggled further into the couch, and pulled a small throw blanket from her bottomless bag. The soft surroundings soothed her frazzled nerves, and eventually she dozed off in safety and contentment.   
  
Minutes or hours later, as time passes differently in theaters with them being realms between, Jester was lightly jostled by firm and familiar arms. “Hey Jessie, I’m just carryin’ you to the car. No worries.” eyes shut tight, trusting the care of her boyfriend, Jester dozed off once more to the rhythmic sway of his step as he held her. Vehicle already started and warm, he clicked her into the buckle, and made sure her tail was inside the vehicle before closing the door. Jester dozed, neither awake nor asleep, but floating in the in-between. Soft warmth surrounded her, a larger, somewhat rough hand sneaking beneath the blanket to hold her own on the drive. She didn’t need to open her eyes to know that he smiled at her whenever there was a stop.   
  
“I’ll be right back, grabbing us food.” she managed to grumble out what seemed like an appropriate response, and felt his smile as he kissed her drowsy cheek. The winter wind that swirled through the warm vehicle as he left made her snuggle deeper into the reclined seat, wiggling toasty toes that sat right against the heat that was blowing on them.   
  
A frumpkin-length nap later, the door opened once more, and this time a barrage of enticing scents swirled around her. Paper bag in hand, Fjord leaned into the back seat and secured what she figured to be a take away dinner, before pulling out and driving them to their small shared apartment. Upstairs, and just enough space for the two of them and a friend if one needed a place to crash, Fjord carried first her, then their dinner and her bag up the staircase, proving once again that she was not the only strong one in the relationship.   
  
Comfortable and finally ready to exist as a person again, Fjord found her happily setting out two large bowls and two sets of ornately painted sticks at their side. Placing the large bag of food on the coffee table that also served as their dining room and studying surface, Jester dutifully scooped noodles and toppings into the bowls before pouring the piping hot and fragrant broth over them.   
“Thank you Jess,” the half orc smiled, tusks nearly fully grown in, “you’re wonderful.”  
  
Jester cocked a hip along with an eyebrow. “I’m wonderful? Silly, you just let me exist as a burrito for nearly an entire evening. I feel practically pampered. Here, eat while it’s still hot.” Shoving a pair of chopsticks into his hand with a small kiss to the cheek, she sat down across from him, each enjoying the other’s company.   
  
Walking through the day each of them had experienced, it was decided that while nothing in particular was bad, that they both were wearing a bit thin, and needed an evening to, as Fjord put it, ‘Get in touch with ourselves and each other.’  
  
And so, began the great pampering.   
  
After consulting briefly with both Molly and Caduceus about what they each recommended, the pair went about their night. Sappy movies were promptly put on the laptop while they both snuggled in jammies, wearing some sort of face mask that ‘Duces said would help them both sleep better. Jester and Fjord watched Oskar and his beloved make eyes at each other, eventually culminating in a rather messy tangle of sweaty bodies, which Jester scrunched her nose at.   
The screen faded to black, far too late in the tiefling’s opinion, and Fjord began combing his fingers through her deep azure hair.   
  
“Jess, you’re sure you’re okay with us not.. Doing those things? You used to be pretty interested in it.” the deep twang prolonged his words, their formation so specifically him that she smiled.   
  
“No, my darling gentleman suitor, I am very very okay with not doing… Those things.” worrying her lower lip with her teeth, she rolled the topic around in her mind a moment before continuing. “Even if I were interested in doing that, having sex and things like it, I know you are not and would not ask you for it.” the appreciation in his eyes encouraged her to go on. “And also, I have found a freedom in not having sex be a thing that is expected of me. For my mother, it is her business, her trade, and she is rightfully proud of it.  Though, as much as I know about it, especially through her, I am not sure if I could separate the act from the mindset of ‘work’ at this point. It would be like if I sold my art, instead of giving it away. It would sap out all of the joy in creating.”   
Her partner nodded, moving fingers through her hair, massaging her scalp in small circles that felt particularly good around the base of her horns.   
  
“Boy am I lucky to have landed you, little missy.”  
  
“Ditto, dear suitor, now, let’s watch another one - apparently this movie is about a magical school.”   
  
The two holding each other, small kisses and snuggles exchanged throughout the rest of the evening, they each found comfort in the arms of the other, and eventually fell asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! You can find me on Tumblr @Caduceus-Tealeaf-Derolo where I scream into the void via liveblogging. I also take prompts - so shoot them at me through my ask box and you might find it on here!


	3. A Handful Of Happiness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fjord and Jester get some one on one time in Zadash

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to @elyiajade for the prompt and pairing!

“Fjord, I smell something delicious.” The pair were walking the streets of Zadash, enjoying some brief alone time from the rest of the Nein, and popping through the tiny shops that peppered the enormous city.

“So do I Jess, but we don’t know where it’s- wooooa-Okay!” Fjord yelped as she cut off his sentence, bouncing on her toes and grabbing him by the hand, yanking him in the direction that her nose lead her.

Around a corner, down an alley, and behind a large and official looking building, Fjord began to get concerned that his girlfriend’s nose was leading them on a wild goose chase. On the other side of the building , however, was an enormous open-air market.

She let out a coo of excitement, talking in all of the colors and smells and sounds, eyes wide, grin splitting her face. Fjord found a matching smile on his own, as he stepped up next to her, taking in her overjoyed reaction at a new space to explore. 

“Pretty miss! A carved comb for your hair?” “Sir! Flowers for your lady!” “Roasted meats for your table, hot stew for a cold night!” the cacophony was nearly deafening, the riotous colors that afforded each merchant’s stall some cover reminding Jester passingly of Mollymauk’s coat. She felt her stomach sink for a moment before her smile returned, and she cast a sideways glance to the half-orc beside her. “Food?”

“Food.” giving her hand a squeeze, he led her over to a halfling selling roasted meat bits on skewers. Purchasing two for each of them, the pair moved through the market admiring different shopkeep’s wares. A few stalls down another vendor sold a spiced vegetable, her neighbor warm wine, and across from them someone offered a thick stew served in small loaves of bread, eaten with spoons of dried gourd. 

While Jester was busy looking over a vendor’s assortment of childrens toys, undoubtedly choosing something as a gift for Kiri when they next saw her, Fjord spotted a pleasure garden, outside a small temple to The Knowing Mistress, and after purchasing the remainder of what they would make their meal, as well as two pastries for dessert, the two settled down within the discrete hedge. The din from the market was far enough away to not impede conversation as they ate, but was also near enough that the two could see each other without relying on their dark vision. 

Making their way through their variety of courses, Jester laid her head on her partner’s thigh, and played with a bit of string from his armor. “Fjord, would you say you’re happy?” 

He seemed to consider the question, running his fingers through her hair, removing the tangles that her soft curls liked to make around the base of her horns. “I would say I’m free, and to me, freedom and happiness are pretty close to the same thing. I’m happy here with you, I am happy travelling with the Mighty Nein, and making new friends, helping those who need it. So yeah, I think I would say I’m happy.” their eyes connected as he brushed some hair behind her ear. “Are you happy, Jester?”

She sighed. “I do not often think I know how to be unhappy, oh captain. There are things that make me sad, but usually I just remind myself of all of the good things that I have, all of my friends, the Traveller, the Nein, Kiri, my momma, you. Those things make me happy, and when I think of them I find it hard to be sad.” a whine escaped her as he pulled his hand away from where it had been running across her scalp, “That, you not petting me, that makes me sad.” Her pout elicited a deep chuckle from Fjord, which made her belly flip as her momma had told her handsome people might make her feel one day. Hand returning to it’s duty, Fjord interlaced his other hand with hers, and rested them on her stomach. 

“You know it’s okay to be sad, though, don’t you?”

“Oh, yes. I have been sad before, after all. I just would much rather be happy, you know?”

“Me too Jessie. Me too.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! You can find me on Tumblr @Caduceus-Tealeaf-Derolo where I scream into the void via liveblogging. I also take prompts - so shoot them at me through my ask box and you might find it on here!


	4. Close Comfort

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Caleb teaches Caduceus and is comforted in return

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was an Anonymous prompt, so thanks to whomever sent it in!

“Excuse me, Mister Clay- May I sit next to you?”  
  
The Firbolg somehow made his normally large form minutely smaller in order to accommodate for the human that wished to sit with him.   
“ _Danke_.”

 

The silence stretched between them, neither uncomfortable, both floating in their own thought as much as they were floating on the open ocean.   
  
“Mister Clay, may I ask you something?”  
  
“Well, sure,” Caduceus tried in vain to keep the weariness out of his voice, “what’s on your mind?”  
  
“Have you often been afraid before?”  
  
The question rolled over the firbolg slowly, setting the fur that dusted the back of his neck on end as he thought on it. “No. No I haven’t, not until recently.”   
  
Caleb nodded, eyes scrunching up like they did when he was thinking something over. “You know I do not handle some things well, combat frightens me, as does the talent I possess, and what I can do with that talent when pressed to do so.”  
  
Caduceus nodded slowly, fiddling with one of the large pieces of carved wood that adorned an ear.   
  
“Well, as unhelpful as this may be, you never really stop being afraid in my limited experience, but you do learn how to handle it, bit by bit. I have a way that I calm myself down, after the battle is over, and the emotions overwhelm me. Would you like me to share it with you?”  
  
“If you think it’ll help, then yes please.”   
  
“ _Ja_ , I do friend.” Caleb took a deep breath, and lightly took the firbolg’s hand in his own, open and palm up. “There are two things I do- one of them is easy if you can think, the other is hard if you can think.” Pausing for an acknowledgement, he continued. “The one that is easy if you can think is this- When the colors are too bright, you look for five things you can see, and you list them in your head. Better if they’re not what is making you afraid. “Sail, friends, barrel, stars, moon.”  
  
Caduceus looked around him, taking in the items as the small human listed them. Curling the thumb of his hand in towards his palm, Caleb went on. “Next, four things you can touch, and you touch them. Box, staff, rope, coat.” Taking Caduceus’ hand in his own once more, Caleb guided the giant-kin to touch the items as he said them, all within reach.   
  
Two fleshed hands still cradling his single furred one, Caleb curled the thumb and pinky into the palm. “Next, you think of three things you can smell. What can you smell?”  
  
Deep breath in, and out, Caduceus closed his eyes. “Sweat, wet wood, metal.”  
  
Eyes open once more, the cleric shot a glance at the wizard who was breathing deeply as well. “ _Gut gemacht._  Now two.” curling the ring finger in on the hand he still held, Caleb looked up. “What two things can you hear?”  
  
Closing his eyes once more, Caduceus relaxed his back into the ship’s railing taking comfort in it’s steady pressure. “Talking from down below, and the ocean’s waves against the ship.”  
  
“ _Trefflich_ ,” Caduceus felt his chest warm with the tone that Caleb used on the foreign word. “Now  _freund_ , what is one thing you can taste.” a single finger extended now, all others against his palm, held in place by the chilled hands of the auburn man before him.   
  
“I can taste the salt in the air.”   
  
“ _Traumhaft_. That was well done friend. How do you feel?”   
  
Caduceus rolled his shoulders and ran his unoccupied hand through his wind blown hair. “Better. Much better. Thank you. What was the second way of calming down, that’s hard if you can think?”  
  
“Ah.  _Richtig_. Well, you have noticed that Nott and I often bunk together, even when we have plenty of rooms?”  
  
“Sure, you did it when we stayed the night at Jester’s Mom’s place.” He could feel Caleb’s discomfort in small twinges, and felt his forehead scrunch in concern. “Mister Caleb, you don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to-.”  
  
The wizard shook his mop of hair, and brushed it out of his eyes. “ _Nein_ , I am okay. We bunk together because she can help me sometimes, when memories are too much, or when my mind will not let go of something I have seen. She holds me as much as she can, and strokes my hair a bit until I calm down.”   
  
“Why is that hard? That sounds wonderful.”   
  
“It is hard, because it is difficult to ask for, and sometimes it is needed and she does not know.”   
  
Understanding lit behind his eyes, as he took in the slight tremor that was in the hands that held his. “Mister Caleb, Nott is on watch, would you come and do that for me? And I will do that for you? We can find somewhere quiet below, and calm each other down some.”  
  
“ _Bitte_. Yes, please.”


	5. Indigo

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> TW:Death (With resurrection)   
> Fjord+Jester pairing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for the awesome prompt, @yourscreechingruinscollector They chose Fjord and Jester, being cute and sweet.
> 
> Have a drabble!

He could feel her eyes on him in the camp at night, little pinpricks of heat that trailed his form as he went through the motions of setting up his bedroll near the fire for warmth. At first it was concerning, the fine hairs on the back of his neck telling him to be wary, but eventually he drew comfort from knowing she was watching; It meant everything was okay, or rather, as okay as they ever really got. 

  
Eventually, he found himself staring back, mostly when she wasn’t looking. He’d watch as she woke up slowly in the morning, noting how the early dawn light made her blue skin a deeper navy, as though the night sky was holding on to her form, refusing to go. Her freckles like the last pinpricks of stars before the sun made its presence known. He didn’t realize that he was offering to take the last shift more and more often, just for those moments before her eyes opened. He watched her when she was scribbling out her art, and tried to not be jealous that he was the only one she seemed unwilling to show it to.   
  
She watched him while he spared, peering through the wisps of her indigo hair and scribbling furiously in the pages of her prized book. He wasn’t there when she purchased green ink, but he heard Beau mention it to Caleb during their watch, and wondered what she would be using it for. He watched her more closely, making sure she had a warm meal in her after a difficult battle, and nearly burning through all of her magic, and making sure she was tucked in with a blanket when she inevitably passed out in her bowl.   
  
He never saw her speaking quietly with Caduceus, discussing how the tall Firbolg was able to tell how people were feeling. He did see the small green gem that she hung from her horns after a particularly prosperous job was done, and he wondered what drew her to it. He almost asked, but found himself afraid of what the answer might be, or what it might not be. He drank deeply that night. Nott found him in the alley after the others had gone to bed, vomiting like a new crew member growing their sea legs, but she didn’t, so it was okay.   
  
The next morning was hell, and he didn’t see her eyes on him, but he felt them - little pinpricks of heat as she came down the stairs, and gently sat next to him at the table they’d claimed the night before. A small touch at the base of his skull, gentle fingers threading through the fine hairs that warned him of her eyes, and the headache was gone along with the lingering haze of alcohol in his bloodstream. She was already speaking to Yasha, barely acknowledging his presence.   
  
He didn’t see her reach out toward him during a battle, as though to prevent a weapon from finding its home in his chest. He didn’t see her gasp as he fell, crumpling like a puppet that’s had its strings cut. He didn’t hear her scream in infernal, the pain of her heart being ripped in half, enough to cause the undead they were fighting to turn into dust as she rushed over to him. He didn’t hear Caduceus whispering that the cycle of life ends in death, and that was simply the way of the world. He didn’t feel her lips on his as the breath escaped his lungs. He didn’t hear her begging her god to bring him back. He didn’t hear her scrambling to find any healing potion she could in her obnoxious pink bag. He didn’t feel her pouring it down his throat, stroking the surface of his skin to help coax it into his system. He didn’t hear her muttering spell after spell to try and heal his broken body.   
  
  
He dreamt in hues of blue.   
  
  
The first thing he saw when his eyes opened was indigo, the color of the deep sky when the sun is about to make its presence known. Freckles like stars, and eyes like the open ocean; Deep, and endless. Soft skin, the color of a mountain flower, like the ones Yasha collected. Lips like blueberries, ripe at the end of summer. Endless blues.   
  
He woke two days later and was told by Beau that it was Jester that brought him back against the suggestion of Caduceus, who she listened to so much in the way of healing and the Gods.

He spoke with Caleb, who told him how she had taken his dying. “Badly.” the mage finished, eyes haunted, “She took it very badly.”   
  


Yasha explained how he got to his room at the inn they’d rented. “She wouldn’t let Duces touch you, she was afraid he’d start you returning to the earth, like the things we kill.”  
  


Nott just looked at him with her large yellow eyes. “Be good for her.”   
He didn’t ask what that meant.

Caduceus came by with tea. “Glad to see you’re looking better.” the sceptic face was impossible to hide from the tall cleric. “I am. Jester did a good job bringing you back. I may not have done it myself, but it’s good to have you around.” The tea chased away some of the shadows that he felt clinging to him.   
  
He slept badly that night, having not seen her.   
  
In the morning, he found a leatherbound book on his bed, just under his hand, tied shut with an indigo ribbon. He tried to not let his heart skip. He failed.   
  
She woke to a kiss on her lips in the early predawn, when the night refuses to give way to day, with stars across her nose, and her eyes like the endless ocean.


	6. Making Use of Jealousy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one is from @princessamericachavez, who wanted Fjord and Jester, and gave the prompt Jealousy

“You know, I think Jester’s getting a little jealous…”   
  
Those words had been rolling around in his mind for weeks now.   
“Jealous? Of what?” He’d been clueless. Beau had looked at him, the same look Caleb gave him from time to time; It was the facial equivalent of “You are just so brilliantly stupid.” and he hated it. It meant he’d missed something, and usually it was something big.

 

Jealous of what… Then he’d gone and carried on with Avantika, and what a right shit show that turned out to be! They’d survived it, but he couldn’t shake that he’d missed a window with Jester. More than a window, it was an entire city gate she’d left open for him, banners strung, flowers thrown for him to walk on, and like an idiot, he’d ignored it. He’d missed it.

The tavern they’d chosen for this stay in Humperdook was rowdy, and he was hard pressed to not simply call it a night. Catching the bartender’s eye he signaled for another drink, doing his best to not pay attention to the small gaggle of young men that surrounded the subject of his thoughts.

“Will you dance with me?”

The question cut through the din of the tavern like a blade, Fjord tightening his grip on the tankard he’d been handed, and grinding his top teeth into the small tusks he was allowing to grow. The ones he was growing for _her_.   
  
A grumbling sigh escaped him, he’d done this to himself really. Tankard to lips, ale to belly, signal another, repeat. Within an hour (and several of Jester’s dance partners) later, he was mumbling under his breath as each one was giggled at prettily, dances accepted, and a drink or some morsel of food ordered on her behalf.   
  
“How you doing there, buddy?” he turned to look up at the lightly furred, pastel cleric that had claimed the chair next to him. “Oof. That’s rough.” He resisted the urge to slam his head into the bar, but only barely.   
  
“Why did I miss it, Duce?” he was proud of his enunciation, considering how bright the room had become.   
“What’d you miss?”  
“Jester. I missed my shot with her. Look-” he gestured to where one admirer was playing a hand game with her, claiming to read her future in the lines of her palm, and another was feeding her bits of an exotic fruit.   
  
“Oh, that-” Caduceus’ tone took on the soft edges that usually meant he was about to say something profound. “Fjord, she’s waiting for you to come.”   
  
The warlock almost fell off his barstool, though that could be attributed to his level of intoxication. “Come where? Did she tell you something? Did you ‘hear’ something? What do you know?!” His voice had become a sort of hiss from his trying to be discreet while also being very drunk, and Caduceus’ brow furrowed a bit in reply.   
“You’re drunk. Here.” The cleric touched him, and sighed happily, clearing Fjord’s mind with a restoration spell. “Go to her, sweep her off her feet, apologize for being an idiot, and then for being a mopey idiot, and ask if you can court her. That’s what my mother always told me my father did, and they were happy. Go do that, and if she says you may, kiss her. Kiss her in front of all of those boys nipping at her heels, and then smile at them over her shoulder, and go get dinner somewhere.”

“You think that’ll work?” he was already standing up.   
“It should, and she’s there, just waiting for someone to swoop in and make all the-” he was walking away, head clearer than it had been in some time.   
  
The gaggle of boys, because there was not a battle hardened man among them, went quiet as he approached. “Excuse me miss, may I have a word?” His southern drawl made the words come out like smooth whiskey, rolling across his tongue, burning oh so sweetly.

  
“Why of course, good sir!” her eyes sparkled as she looked him over, taking his offered hand, and allowing him to close the gap between them, forcing her admirers to move back slightly.

Placing a gentle kiss to the top of her hand, he looked up into her eyes, sparkling with mirth. “May I ask this lovely lady for the favor of a dance?” the sound of grinding teeth was like music to his ears, and he couldn’t help the smile that crawled across his lips.   
  
“Well, how can I ever say no to such a polite request? Of course.” Turning to the gaggle of onlookers, Jester smiled sweetly. “Please excuse me, gentlemen, this song begs to be danced to.”   
  
Turning back to Fjord, he only barely caught her small wink, as her tail draped across his wrist. “Shall we dance then?”  
  
The gods smiled on him that moment, and the jaunty dances that were usually played in a place such as this were slowed down, and so he was able to sway with her in his arms, rotating slowly.   
  
“Jess, I’m sorry.” She’d been seeing what trouble she could cause by smacking people with her tail, and making it seem like someone else, but this comment brought her attention fully to him.   
  
“Sorry? What for, Fjord?”  
“For being an idiot, and not paying attention. Then, for paying attention but not doing anything about it, and being a right ass about it.” He might be imagining it, but her cheeks seemed to color somewhere closer to the purple side of her skin tone, and he felt his heart leap. “I’m sorry for all of that, though I’m sure there’s more I could be sorry for, but I’ve been reminded that I’m not very smart from time to time.”   
  
She clicked her tongue against her teeth in a dismissal. “You’re very smart Fjord, just not where I wanted you to be. You’re allowed to feel as you feel, I have no right to your attention, not really.” Her tail had curled around the wrist that he rested on her waist, and squeezed lightly.   
“What if I wanted you to have a right? Would you be open to that? I understand if that ship has sailed, but I thought I might give it a shot, now that my head’s on straight.”  
“What are you asking me Fjord?” her face was too hard to read for him to know what her answer might be, and he briefly thought of simply dropping the question.   
“I’m asking if You, Miss Jester Lavorre, might be interested in being courted by me. I know I’m not much, but if you’ll let me, I’d like to.”  
She nearly stopped their dance, but managed to keep moving with only a slight delay in their timing. “Yes please.”   
  
The words were barely more than a whisper, and Fjord had to lean down slightly, so she could repeat them over the noise around them.   
“Yes, please, I’d love for you to court me.”   
His heart soared, his stomach flipped around, and his mouth split in two with a wide grin that showed the beginning of what would one day be a set of pearly tusks.   
  
“May I kiss you, Jester? In front of all of those boys who were posturing for your attention?”  
  
She gasped, and he thought for a moment that he’d stepped too far. “Oh Fjord! That would be the best prank EVER! Yes yes yes yes! Let’s do it!”   
  
The song came to an end as he spun her out, and then into his chest once more, holding her close as her skirts swished around her legs, brushing lightly against his. Looking up through his eyelashes, he was gratified to see every lad’s eyes were piercing into the pair, as he pulled her back to his chest and swayed to the last notes, placing a chaste but meaningful kiss to her lips. Her free hand snaked up his chest and around his neck, threading through his hair as the kiss ended, and their foreheads touched.   
“How about some dinner, Jessie?”   
“Yes, please.”


	7. Mindful

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Caleb is a ranked officer, and Molly claims to be an Ambassador -   
> Everyone knows him, but caleb knows none of them, what's going on?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to my current ‘biggest fan’ on my blog - @nuckton for the lovely prompt - Widomauk - sci-fi AU. It’s out of my usual wheelhouse, so I hope I did the prompt justice- Enjoy!

“I need to speak to a human, it is of paramount importance, and I know you have at least one on this ship.” Gaudily dressed, even for this planet, Mollymauk Tealeaf drummed fingers on his sleeve, crossed arms brokering no argument. “I am an ambassador to this planet from Terra, and I have need of a human to assist me. As is my right by decree of the Concord, I claim whomever the highest ranking human is within this ship as an associate of my delegation.”   
  
The guard raised an eyebrow, and turned to their companion, speaking in a language Molly assumed to be orcish. “It would behoove you to move quickly. My bodyguard will not hesitate.”  
Beside him, Fjord twitched perceptively, fingers moving to summon some eldritch energy to his palm.

The guard narrowed their eyes, and grunted to the other, sending them into the docked spaceship. “We have only one ranked officer that is also human within this ship - he was trained by the Archmage of the Dwendallian Empire of Terra. The captain will not release him from service lightly.” 

  
Fjord stepped forward, energy still sparking along his palm as he spoke, inspecting his nails absently. “His Grace the Ambassador does not care about the minor opinions of a meager ship captain. You can find another arcane caster, and we will pay a stipend for the trouble.”  
  
On Molly’s other side, Jester handed Beau a small sachel of coin, along with five other coins that glinted in the dock’s fluorescent lighting. “Hey, friend, or the captain’s trouble, and for yours.” she said, handing over first the pouch, and then the other coins. A bruske nod from the guard while he eyed Yasha with apprehension, and the party waited.  
  
Ten agonizing minutes later, a human was escorted to the walkway off the ship. Flanked by the absent guard, and a well decorated formally dressed woman that Molly assumed to be the captain, the three disembarked, coming to stand a scant twenty feet from them.  
  
“So, you come to claim one of my crew? Under the law of Terra and the orders of whom?”  
  
“Tech-nic-ally,” Jester drew out the first word as though admonishing the Captain for misunderstanding their intent, “under the law of the Dwendallian Empire, on behalf of Terra, under direct orders of the Clovis Concord, to establish trade agreements.” Brandishing a thick piece of  what looked like velum that held fancy calligraphy where words could be seen, she smiled. “You will find everything in order should you like to check.”

The captain paled perceptively, shooting a glare at the guard who had fetched them, and pressing the arcane practitioner forward a step or two. “Have him. This is the Mage Caleb Widogast, of Terra, from the Dwendalian Empire.” Turning to the auburn man, she muttered through clenched teeth. “I will have your belongings brought out in a moment.”  
  
Caleb nodded, stood back from the captain another step, and bowed briefly. “At your will, captain.”   
  
A sneer crawled across her face. “It’s not my will, Arcanist, it’s the fucking concord’s. Consider this-” she jammed the sachel of coin that the guard was trying to pass her at him. “Your remaining wages from this journey.”  
  
Caleb, meanwhile, was shaking - not with rage, but with fear. This was new, new and unfamiliar, and frightening. The ship had systems, standards, expectations for what his day would look like, and looking over the colorful assortment of individuals who had apparently just demanded his assistance, it looked like the only surety between them was utter chaos.

Caleb’s mind raced, taking in the new individuals; A Half Orc, two Tieflings, a large and imposing female humanoid who set his hackles up, a long and lanky male with pink hair and a kind of teal chitin armor. Movement behind the pink male made him blink just as a shrill voice entered his mind. “Caleb, don’t worry, you’re safe. You may not know us, but we know you. Just play along, I promise you’re safe. You-can-respond-to-this-message.”  
  
“Ah, well, Danke.” was all he managed to get out before he felt the magic dissipate, and was being approached by the two horned individuals, both with jewelry that caught the light in little glimmers, though the purple one was far more ostentatious than the other.

  
“He-llo Cay-leb!” The blue female sing-songed in a way that was both alien and familiar, as though he had heard the way of speaking before, but never known the face of who spoke. It made an itching in his mind, like a thought that tried to escape him.  
  
“Hello. I am at your command, Ambassador.” He bowed as he’d been taught to do, eyes to the ground, the picture of obedience. A strangled choking sound reached his ears, and when he looked up, he saw the purple one had turned away, tail thrashing about in what Caleb’s mind told him was agitation or anger. What had he done?  
  
The half orc stepped forward to address the confusion the Human was feeling. “It’s not your fault, friend. We’ll explain in a bit.”   
  
Ten minutes later, all of Caleb’s possessions were in the obnoxiously pink bag that the blue tiefling carried, with the exception of Frumpkin, who was currently in his pocket dimension.

“Where are we going, if I may ask, Ambassador?”  
  
Tail thrashing back and forth with each step, the gaudily dressed male called back to him, barely turning. “A tavern. I need a drink, and you will too, once we’re in private.”  
  
Mind whirling with possibilities, Caleb followed the group to a fairly nice tavern, certainly better than anything he’d have purchased personally, but not the fanciest place this planet had to offer.   
  
Upon entering, ordering a round of drinks brought up to the rooms that they’d previously secured, and making their way upstairs, Caleb found himself sat at a low table in a sort of common area that held four bedrooms off of it, fairly private from what he could tell, though he didn’t want to start casting to double check unless given permission.   
  
The tall individual, Duce as the rest called him, dropped an illusion as they entered and cracked his neck. “It’s not like I’m physically changed, but those illusions make me feel so cramped. Jester, let’s check the place over one more time, just in case.”   
  
The blue tiefling, Jester, cast some sort of magic that Caleb realized was divine along with Duce, and then scanned the room. “All clear, we should be fine.”   
  
The half orc and the small one, who Caleb realized was a female goblin, were busy over some sort of device made of a combination of technology and arcane energy. Setting it up behind the closed door, and pressing a button, Caleb felt the magic he had trained to harness just… melt away from him, still there, but out of reach.   
  
Suppressing his mounting panic at being in an unfamiliar place with unfamiliar people, where they just suppressed his magical abilities, Caleb stood, and began to pace in small bursts, trying to not let his discomfort show.   
  
Drinks brought, and everyone sprawled around the table, the party looked to one another, before the half orc gestured to Duce.   
“Mister Caleb, would you mind me doing something? Or me and Jester doing something? We think you have magic on you that doesn’t seem good, and we’d like to take it off.”   
  
“Do… do I have a choice?”

The varied answers were not comforting, ranging from a “No!” from the goblin and the human female beside her, a drawn out “Well-” from Jester, an “I would imagine so,” from Duce, nothing from the half orc or the woman that Caleb now realized was of celestial blood, and silence from the nearly garish purple individual that Caleb still only knew as ‘The Ambassador’.   
  
“Mister Mollymauk?” Duce’s voice was soft and coaxing.   
  
Molly’s face was full of grief, tears streaming down his cheeks, red eyes pleading even as he said the words. “Of  **course**  you have a choice, Caleb.”  
  
“Then yes.” Caleb watched Mollymauk as the words passed his lips, his stomach twisting in distressed knots, telling him that  _he_  was the reason this beautiful individual wept. The tiefling’s tail stopped it’s rapid movement, and his voice was barely more than a hoarse whisper.  
  
“Really?”  
  
“Yes, do it.”  
  
There was a whirlwind of movement, as the goblin went over to the magical suppression device, Duce and Jester moved to either side of him, and the enormous assimar put a comforting hand on Mollymauk’s shoulder. The half orc and the human female watched intently, as the goblin disengaged the device, and Caleb felt his magic within his grasp once again. A split second later, the two clerics spoke, and Caleb felt his mind pulse as their spell hit a barrier he hadn’t known existed. Another casting, he could feel the strain they were under to break whatever shield existed in his mind, a third casting, and the barrier cracked. The fourth casting made the wall shatter, and Caleb felt his mind splinter into a thousand pieces, before a cool touch smoothed back his hair, and his understanding knit itself back together.   
  
Opening his eyes, everyone was watching him. The goblin, no… Nott. Nott, the Brave pressed the button once more, and the room’s magical aura was once more suppressed.   
  
Breath entered his lungs in a rush, making him realize he hadn’t had oxygen in several moments. Mollymauk - no… Molly. Molly was asking Caduceus and Jester if it’d worked, Beau, and Fjord, and Yasha were still silent, as he sat up.   
  
“Molly.”   
  
The name was out of his mouth, and the tiefling was across the table and in his arms. Memories flooded back to him as he comforted Molly, working backwards to when they’d last seen each other.   
The ship, working in the labs, being ill at the school, blankness, Trent Ikithon casting something on him. “How  ** _FUCKING DARE_** he take you from me?”  
Caleb wasn’t sure if the words had come from him, or from Molly, safely in his arms.  
  
“I will never let you go again.”  
“Please don’t.”  
  
“And I am going to destroy the Archmage.”   
  
“No darling,  ** _We_**  are going to destroy the Archmage.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! You can find me on Tumblr @Caduceus-Tealeaf-Derolo where I scream into the void via liveblogging. I also take prompts - so shoot them at me through my ask box and you might find it on here!


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